MISSOULA — Joshua Nehring made a pit stop in Missoula this week on his journey to run across the country, stopping in every capital city in the Lower 48 to share a special message about grief.
Nehring has run more than 3,700 miles since June. By next June, the South Dakota dentist and co-founder of nonprofit SRVIVRS, aims to end his Black Pearl Project run at over 17,000 miles.
“It’s called the ‘Black Pearl Project’ because black pearls are formed from a very specific irritant that gets into a shellfish and that shellfish then layers and layers itself with a particular type of nacre and it forms a black pearl,” Nehring said. “In our own life, death is also a very unique irritant. If we embrace that grief and that hurt and that dark, and layer it with layers of service, then we can also transform that irritant into a gift.”
The run is part of an awareness campaign by Nehring’s SRVIVRS organization, which aims to help those dealing with loss turn their pain into something positive.
Nehring and his wife Stacy tragically lost their daughter Lilli in 2017. In their grief, they started SRVIVRS with other parents who lost their children.
“The ‘I’ is in the middle, you surround yourself with service and it's a way to move forward when something very hard and very yucky and tough comes into life,” Nehring said, explaining the SRVIVRS logo on his t-shirt.
In the wake of his daughter’s passing, Nehring turned to running to help cope. While out on a run, he thought up the Black Pearl Project.
Each day, he dedicates his mileage to the memory of a different person. Nehring encourages people to submit the names of loved ones to the SRVIVRS website so he can run in their honor.
The Montana leg of his journey has exemplified the goals of Nehring’s journey. In Lincoln, he and his family connected with their campground host, who lost his daughter a decade ago. After a very frank talk about grief, Nehring said the man called him to coordinate a meeting up again and to continue to heal through talking.
“We have met hundreds of people and just have seen that little bit of light or a little bit of hope that comes into their eyes,” Nehring said. “That's the fuel for me and my family is meeting those individuals and families that, that need that.”
In addition to meeting people along the way, Nehring stressed the importance of being out in the world, embracing the tough and beautiful aspects of his journey. So far in Montana, he has seen bugling elk and plenty of bear tracks. To him, the run itself symbolizes the process of grief.
“I like bikes better than running, and I really want to pedal, but I just felt like it was really important that it's a step by step, because that's kind of how grief is. It’s every step and you can't progress without taking steps, Nehring said. “If you just sit still, you don't move.”
Tuesday morning, Nehring picked up his run after a brief nap in Frenchtown. Running along I-90 towards the next capital on his list, Olympia, WA, Nehring is taking his journey one step at a time.
To learn more about SRVIVRS and submit a name, click here.
